Freaky little dogs and MY BOOK

She crouched in the back of the cage, terrified and shaking, a black and white bundle all ears and bulging eyes. I reached into the cage and she snapped at me. Bitch. “Whoa,” I said. The volunteer chuckled. “Yeah, that one’s really scared.” We eventually got her out, and she stood unsteadily, looking around like she was expecting the apocalypse, tail so far between her legs it nearly reached her chest. I picked her up. She felt lighter than my purse.Read more

A Holiday Round-up for your entertainment

Dear generous readers, The worst thing about being a writer is not writing. When I’m not writing, my waking hours consist of strange and beautiful sentences forming in my head, begging to be eternalized through the stroke of a few keys. They had wanted to name her Astrid, but between the language barrier and her mother’s fledgling literacy, she got stuck with Aspic. She didn’t know it was a bad name until her fourth grade teacher helpfully explained to the class that aspic was alsoRead more

Immigrant status, and the deportation of an American adoptee

Every year around this date, I remember that National Adoption Month has nearly passed without me recognizing it, which makes me feel hugely deficient. So Happy National Adoption Month. Adoption is a beautiful, heartbreaking, complicated way to form a family, and the circumstances surrounding it are filled with joy and sadness and perpetual grief. Yay! My three little bugs, as you know, were adopted, the oldest from Vietnam and the younger two from Guatemala. They were adopted; it’s not a chronicRead more

Dear Savvy Sister: What to do about Post-Traumatic Election Disorder?

Dear Savvy Sister, What the hell do I do with my sense of anger and despair? This is unprecedented. Sincerely, Bereft Dear Bereft and scores of other generous readers, What to do, what to do. On occasion, the Savvy Sister feels as despondent as her readers, and this is one of those occasions. The idea of a President Trump defies believability; we have elected a leader who has no experience, no knowledge of government, and a devolved moral code. AndRead more

The Tyrant picks her battles, and we both learn about karma.

The Tyrant won’t clean her room. It’s infuriating, and baffling. When I’m afraid it’s infested with something, I clean it for her, and organize everything properly, and explain to her how straightening her room for 10 minutes a day is all she needs to do. “Okay, Mom!” she’ll say happily, because she likes when her room is clean. And then, I swear, like two hours later, she’s lounging around in a crack den. Last week, under the detritus covering herRead more

Bernie Sanders came to my house, and he slept under the covers.

Every weekend I visit the rescue dogs at Pet Supermarket as a test of willpower. This is a secret, except sometimes I make one of the children come in case he/she so falls in love with a pup that I HAVE to take it home. This might sound familiar because this is exactly the way we acquired Yobe the Rescue Dog, and afterwards Hot Firefighter Husband made me promise to never ever do that again. I didn’t exactly promise but I conceded thatRead more

Trump’s accusers: Um….I know how they feel…..

As I’m writing this, nine women have accused Donald Trump of sexual assault or sexual harassment – or sexual aggression, you might call it. It’s difficult to believe, right? Because why are they just coming forward now, less than a month before the election? It’s suspicious. If what he did to them was so bad, they would have filed some sort of complaint. Press pause. In 1988, I started graduate school at Boston University, studying for a master’s degree inRead more

A high school fails its own civics lesson, and free speech takes a hit.

Last week, my daughter’s high school hosted a “Club Fair” at lunch so students could see a display of all the school’s clubs and decide which ones to join. The Diva saw a Young Republicans Club, so BECAUSE BOOM, SHE’S MY KID, she looked around for a Young Democrats club. There wasn’t one. She came home and told me, and I was all, for the love of Harry S. Truman, how typical of a high school located in this corner of St. JohnsRead more

Kaepernick Redux, and more black oppression

Well, it was nice to hear from so many of you! Apparently we are very passionate about: a. standing up for the national anthem b. sitting down for the national anthem c. whether Colin Kaepernick is a decent quarterback d. pro football season in general A recap: last month, I wrote about football player Colin Kaepernick, a quarterback for the 49ers, and his decision to quietly sit down for the national anthem when it’s played at the beginning of hisRead more

The National Anthem, Colin Kaepernick, and real respect.

Last Sunday, Hot Firefighter Husband said, “This is the last Sunday I’ll be uninterested in what’s on tv.” Because football. And because being obsessed with politics doesn’t take up nearly enough of his time. My eyes began rolling in big dizzying circles. BUT THEN here comes Colin Kaepernick, a quarterback for the San Francisco 49ers, letting his brain focus on something other than big men chasing small balls. Okay, man. Now I’m interested. Colin Kaepernick is the guy who wouldn’t stand up for theRead more