That time I had a perfect moment.

I recently read a short story by Arthur Krystal in The New Yorker about an old man ruminating on his life. He had the sudden realization that most of what had happened during his 70-odd years on the planet was gone from his memory bank. He was left with fragments of occurrences, like still portraits or maybe three-second films. The concept has stuck with me. Most of what happens to us in life will be forgotten, as real and sharpRead more

Man-things I do now, Part II

My outdoor shower is roomy enough for a few plants and a footstool, and for more than one bather, if that’s a necessity. It’s not. No one bathes there but me. My kids think it’s weird. But I’m not the only visitor there. I have to keep the soap in a plastic container because otherwise it gets stolen. The thief seems partial to lavender but not lemon verbena, so I myself have become partial to lemon verbena.  I’m pretty sureRead more

Man-things I do now, Part I

On Halloween, I was cutting the grass aggressively with my new eco-friendly battery-powered lawn mower. I have a large yard that’s kind of unruly, and sometimes I get ambitious. I can get rough with my outdoor equipment.  I spotted some brush in the bamboo garden and plowed ahead, thinking how satisfying it would feel when the remnants came spitting out of the mower. As I pushed, I felt a sharp pain on the back of my ankle. “SNAKE!” my veryRead more

Signs of home (which are not allowed)

I’m afloat in my world right now, coasting between who I thought I was (married) and who I’m now destined to be (lots of things?). It’s an exciting, scary, exhausting, limboid journey littered with danger and uncertainty. Limbo – that’s where unbaptized babies were thought to go, in the Catholic doctrine of my youth. I always had viewed it as a crushing injustice, that a tiny baby would forever have to hover between heaven and hell simply because no priestRead more

I’m back, possibly.

I met a man recently who said he liked to read, so I thought maybe we had something in common. “Not fiction, though,” he said. “I like to actually learn something when I read.”  So I killed him. Then I spent the next few hours lamenting the fact that much of America has stopped reading not only fiction, but anything at all. Judging by our obesity rate, people don’t even read food labels.  Maybe you’re one of my excellent peepsRead more

Moving on in Single steps

“you are terrifyingand strange and beautifulsomething not everyone knows how to love.” – poet Warsan Shire Many years ago, I drove my grandmother home from the hospital after my grandfather died. She wept. “I don’t know who’s gonna fold my sheets now,” she cried. My grandfather had approached laundered sheets like they were wild animals in need of taming. As she cried, I reached over and put my hand on her shoulder, and accidentally swerved out of my lane. “KEEPRead more

BlogVid-19, Post #2. FOMO/graduation version.

This week we received an email from our county schools superintendent. It read, in part: Today, I have made the very difficult decision to cancel all traditional high school graduations.  The UNF arena is no longer available and I believe our high schools need to be consistent in how we celebrate the Class of 2020. In addition, COVID-19 could still be a threat into the summer, we simply do not know. Your school will communicate virtual graduation plans as soon asRead more

This is BlogVid-19, Post #1

I’ve been wondering what I can do about the pandemic, besides stay home, wash my hands, and donate my firefighter husband to the cause. But then I remembered: I’m a writer! I can entertain/educate/offend people! So here I am. In theory, it’s nice to be at home more. I spend many hours on my back patio, listening to birds, and panicking about the online teaching work I’m not doing and the pending pandemic apocalypse. I feel like I should writeRead more

Ants (not in my pants).

An army of sugar ants are marching around the kitchen. Sometimes I find them on the bathroom counter, too. We’ve removed all items from the pantry, confirmed the airtightness of everything, and wiped down the shelves. The ants remain. The other day I noticed them roaming around a plate of homemade cookies everybody had been eating. The cookies were nevertheless delicious. My neighbor gave me some Terro ant killer which is essentially liquid borax. She said to put little puddlesRead more

Dear Savvy Sister, Part 2. The answer.

**Did you read Part 1? Do that first so this makes sense. Dear Saggy Sister – It’s true that I’m very smart. I am also very beautiful, and wish you had mentioned it. But it’s hard to hand out compliments when you’re low, so let’s see what we can do to pull you up a bit. First, let me apologize for failing to anticipate this. A living spirit must be nurtured and loved, and I have been busy NOT INTERFERINGRead more