Excuses, excuses, plus BREAKING NEWS.

The Latest Plan – to simplify, remember? – is so damn complicated, and it bums me out. In my ideal world, my daily schedule includes a good 2-hour writing block, folding some laundry, straightening the house, picking vegetables from my garden to make a home-cooked dinner, delving into a great book, a workout, a short nap, yard work with the kids or maybe some cooking time with the kids. Remember, this is an ideal version of life.

There are some roadblocks to implementing this fantastical routine, aside from the need for 42-hour days. First of all, I don’t have a garden. I can’t work in my yard because it’s so desolate I wouldn’t know where to start. I’d love to cook with the kids, but they’d rather play Minecraft or stick toothpicks under their thumbnails. My writing time usually consists of answering teacher emails and returning phone calls. Whenever I start reading, my eyelids shut. So nap – check. Working out is a mental health priority, so I usually get that done.IMG_0806

If you’re a mother with pre-school children, and you think you’ll have SO MUCH TIME ON YOUR HANDS as soon as that little bugger starts kindergarten, listen: that time will slip through your hands like a wad of cash at Target. All those crafting projects, the plan to organize your photos, your burning desire to write a novel – it will all take a backseat to laundry, groceries, the endless parade of paperwork sent home by your child’s school, time-sucking searches for transparent plastic rulers pre-cut for 3-ring binders, more laundry, and meeting friends for coffee to complain about having no time.

GET TO THE POINT, WOMAN. Okay. I’m just going to put this out there.

THIS BLOG IS STRESSING ME OUT. I’m so fearful of disappointing you that I’ve been avoiding you, and that’s not right. Also, I’ve been harboring a secret.

I’m not quitting the blog, so don’t freak out or get too excited. You know who you are. No – but an awesome publisher is interested in my work. For real. And she wants me to put together a manuscript. IT’S A DREAM COME TRUE! ALL I’VE EVER WANTED! I’M TRIPPING ALL OVER MYSELF TRYING TO GET IT DONE, RIGHT? Well. Not so much. Instead, I’ve been sitting on this knowledge for months thinking that I can’t do it. I’m too busy. I’ve got the blog. I’ve got the kids. I’ve got my messy life.

But all of that is simultaneously true and not true. Of course I’m busy – I’ve got a perfect teenage angel and two demons three children to raise and a household to hose down run. Yes, life is messy. I’m getting older. There’s death and illness and sadness, plus the Pterodactyl’s endless string of needs stretched toward me like tentacles, invisibly attached, sucking the life out of me special challenges.

But writing is what I do. It’s an urge deep inside me, and has been since I was a tiny girl who loved to read. I’ve practiced doing it all my life. So here’s what I’m going to do:

I’m going to make this book thing happen. I’m going to be a writer who is working on an actual manuscript that’s based on the blog. I don’t want to quit the blog because you people are like my therapists, and Holy Freud, I still need me some therapists. So I’ll still write occasional posts, but I’m going to limit my posts to once a week, and sometimes they’ll be shorter.

Can you live with that? If I ask nicely? In return, I’ll personally autograph your copy of my book, which may or may not be entitled The Naked Truth. Probably not, though.

I can’t do everything. But I can choose who I am, and how I’m defined. I will never be a master gardener. My house will probably always be a tiny bit messy. But four roles are critically important to me – mom, friend, general badass woman, and WRITER. And writers must write.

Here I go. Wish me luck, Generous Readers. I love you.

25 responses to Excuses, excuses, plus BREAKING NEWS.

  1. Kara says:

    Awesome post! Congrats on writing and book deal–so happy and excited for you. Can’t wait to read it. You are hysterical!

  2. Rebecca says:

    Totally happy for you. Now get to work. 🙂

    • tricia says:

      You want me to bang AND write? Damn, I’ll be so busy….xo

  3. Christina says:

    I am so happy for you!! Good luck and don’t forget to come by and say hi every now and then. I can’t wait to read your first book!

  4. Valle says:

    I can not WAIT to read this book! And while you’re working away on it, maybe i can sneak down and the kids and I will dig you out a lovely garden.

    • tricia says:

      NOTHING would make me happier. I’ll cook for you. xoxo

  5. Rahmi says:

    You go, Girl! Do what you’re meant to, what makes you happy! Happy Mom(wife) happy house (life)… I’m behind you all the way!!!! Can’t wait for my signed copy

  6. Kelly says:

    Holy Oscar Wilde Erma Bombeck mash up, Squishiness!!! This is such good news!! In a screwy world, finally something that makes sense. Can’t wait, though we shall patiently await your genius!!

  7. Elinor says:

    I like your priorities, Tricia! Can’t wait to read the book!

  8. Carol Jean and JoAnn says:

    It’s about time Tricia. With your talent, JUST DO IT!

  9. maree says:

    It will happen; it will be amazing; and I do want at least one signed copy! When it is launched … a great excuse to come visit and witness your brilliance!!
    Much love and luck my friend

  10. Norma says:

    Go get em’… And may you sell a million copies.. Will you remember me when you’re on the NYT best seller list?

  11. Matz says:

    Great news! I guess I’m the disgruntled reader. Will miss the blog big time. Can you just e-mail me snippets of how it’s going? I’ll go through withdrawals if not. Can’t wait for the longer version! You deserve this more than anyone I know. That is the truth!!!

  12. christine obrien says:

    Well, well, well. Be careful what you wish for eh? I’m so happy for you and will look forward to weekly blogs then. I am having dinner with Nicole tonight and we will talk about you so notice if your ears are burning about 7pm missy. Go make history!!!!!

  13. Kate LeSar says:

    You go, girl. I’ve been in your spot– two youngsters, animals, grad school and a job. The best pieces of advice I have: You have only this time to make lasting memories with your kids, so skimp on other things, but not them. Get up as early as you can to carve out quiet writing hours, then go to bed early. Enlist your family support. Kids like feeling needed and can do a lot more than we think. Fold their own laundry, prepare dinner and clean up, share in weekly cleaning, etc. Sure, they might grumble, but rewards work. So does sharing your successes with them. Remember that you can do almost everything you want in life, but not always in the same decade. A spotless house , gourmet meals, a garden and maybe even the weekly blog can be delayed if writing and kids are your focus for now. GOOD LUCK

  14. Amy says:

    Perfection. You. Awesome. You won’t need luck, you will rock. Can’t wait for the movie!! Miss you 😉

  15. Tracy Miller says:

    Girl, take it down to once every two weeks and update us generally, and maybe less thoughtfully or less perfectly, on FB. Stop stressing yourself out over a blog. Which is not to say I do not enjoy reading it, but I think it takes me a fraction of the time to read it as it does you to write it, so invest in yourself and your dream. We’ll wait patiently. I clearly do not know anyone else who posts here, but I am bossy and I will speak for all of them.

  16. Linda says:

    I’d like to sign up for the alerts and purchase during pre-sales please. Where do I go? Simon & Schuster? The once a month blog might fit in there somewhere still, while finishing your book. I’d hang on to the blog too, if at all possible, because if you get stumped in a particular situation/scenario, and not sure which of, say, out of 3 choices which is the one that could bring it on home, we’re here and available for suggestions or what we’d like the outcome to be. Well, I am anyway. I’m not going anywhere. I hope you’ll still be able to tuck little snippets of your daily life under my pillow since I usually read your status and your blog at night. (Today is a rare exception.) Sounds great. I’ve been waiting for an announcement like this from you for quite a while now. It’s happy news, indeed!

  17. Louise says:

    YIPPEE!! So, just checking in. How many words have you written?

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